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August 30, 2007

my mom

Probably starting last year my mom and step dad talked about moving to Florida, so my step dad could finish college. He's into production, animation, computer stuff like that. I never thought it was real until my step dad left us and moved to Florida a couple of months ago to start school the beginning of July. He has been waiting patiently for my mom to come down, but first she had to sell their home and tie up lose ends. In away even with my step dad gone, it didn't seem real that my mom would be leaving me. Then last week, she went to Florida for the weekend to visit my step dad, and she had a job interview. My talented mother got hired on the spot. Now it is real. My mom is leaving me next Friday morning and moving thousands of miles away.
I can no longer run to her when I am excited, I can no longer run to her when I am sad, and I can no longer just go to her and just hang out. No more early Saturdays errands that turns into an all day shopping spree. You see, I call my mom when I need to know what aisle # a food is in at the grocery store, I call my mom when I am sitting in traffic, I call my mom just to ask her why she hasn't called me that day, I think I call my mom to much..
Since I moved out 6 years ago, my mom has always been around the corner if not closer. I am happy for her, don't get me wrong. She has always hated the Michigan winters, and has claimed to be living in the wrong state since I was little. When the opportunity came to leave, I know she jumped at the chance 1st thing. There will be visits, she says she will come home on Thanksgiving to meet her new granddaughter who should be here and to see us all. I'm sure we will go visit her too. She is leaving Hannah her computer and a web cam so we can keep in touch. She sees the flickr pictures and she reads this site (yet she NEVER comments), so I will not lose contact all together, just seeing my mom face to face it what I will miss. No more spending the nights at Grandmas house, no more invites to dinner.
I will miss my mom. And even as I sit and type this, the blur of the tears is getting to much for me to hold back....oops, there goes one down my cheek.

I know I will eventullay be okay. My mom told me last week she is confident leaving me, because I have my family to take care of, but I still picture her next Friday morning as she drives away and I feel part of me leaving too. I think, as I sit here and type that I am losing my best friend. I love my mom and I will miss her.
Mom, I hope you have a safe trip and good luck starting your new job.

4 comments:

  1. Just remember how blessed you are to have such a wonderful relationship with your Mom!! And, even though it won't be the same - you will still have the phone to call her whenever you want and the computer. AND....now you get to visit Florida for vacations!! Sending you hugs b/c I know this is going to be hard!

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  2. Oh my gosh I'm tearing up just reading that. You will be okay Tasha, it will just take some adjusting to. You are super lucky to be that close to your mom, and your bond won't change a bit! Hugs! And hang in there!!

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  3. Oh Tasha, I feel your pain. I could never imagine my mom not being there. I'm the same as you, I call her to ask what I should set my oven on for the dish I'm baking, what I should do when my daughter is sick, or just to tell her something funny I heard on TV. Try to remember though that she is only a phone call away at any time of the day. Get yourself free long distance, or free mobile-to-mobile minutes....and aren't we so lucky to have the internet??? Big hugs to you!!

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  4. I dont know how it feels to have my mom closer to me (in distance...) coz my mother lives 10,000 miles away from me. The last time is saw her was 4 years ago for 15 days. But i can tell you something, my mom is still one phone call away. even at 30, i know i can call my mom at 3am and she'll be there to listen to me cry. just that. to listen to me telling her i miss her, i want her to hug me, etc. she'll be far away physically, but never doubt she'll be with you! you can always have her in your heart! be strong tashi! your mom will always be your best friend! :) in michigan, florida, or china! :)

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